3 Ways to Live with Insecurity

Putting your doubts to work for you.

I used to think that once I became a published author, signed contract after contract, had books on the shelf at Barnes & Noble, that I’d kick insecurity to the curb. Hah. Turned out that was a big, fat lie. In fact, if anything, I feel more doubtful than ever about my writing.

And I’m not the only one. I know lots of big name authors who feel the same.

But you know what? A little insecurity is a good thing. It prods you to produce your best and keeps you from turning into an arrogant monster. The flip side, though, is when that insecurity gets out of control. When you get all knotted up with anxiety and stop producing, insecurity becomes a danger.

To prevent that from happening, here are some handy dandy ways to live with your doubts…

1. Compile a self-esteem file.

When someone gives you a compliment, write it down and file it. Did you get a great review? Print it out and toss that in the file as well. Read a Bible verse that spells out how special you are in God’s eyes? Copy it and wing that in the file too. Then the next time you’re down on yourself, pull that file out and remember that you are valuable to others and to God.

2. Cultivate relationships with supportive people.

Friends who listen and validate your feelings are worth their weight in gold—and worth their weight in Bitcoin if they also offer words of encouragement. These are your peeps, your squad, your “garden friends”…those you can turn to when insecurity whaps you over the head.

3. Remember that your insecurity is invisible.

You don’t stick out like a sore thumb, all throbby and red, whenever you get in a funk. That’s important to know so that you don’t go thinking everyone can see what a loser you are. In fact, most people are too caught up in their own insecurities to notice yours.

Everyone has periods of insecurity. Next time you go into a funk, try these suggestions and know that you’re not alone. I’m probably biting my nails over my next manuscript feeling like a poser. Drop me note and I’ll commiserate with you.