5 Common Word Conundrums

All I remember from high school Spanish is how to say, "I broke my leg." That may come in handy should I decide to run the bulls in Pamplona, but otherwise, not so much. I'll stick to English, thank you very much. But even English has its glitches, and today I'll shine the spotlight on five bugaboos that even the most seasoned writer can mess up.

Weird not Wierd
This one throws me every stinking time. But not anymore. Here is a handy dandy way to remember the correct spelling of weird . . .
WE (we) IR (are) D (deadly) to tiny, baby kittens.
And every time you spell it wIErd a tiny baby kitten gets punched in the head. Don't be a brute. Save the kittens.

Then vs Than
Honestly, I don't understand the mass confusion surrounding these two words. Nevertheless, I'm here to help.
THEN is used for time: First I stole a car and then I crashed into a cop.
THAN is used for comparison: I'm much better at stealing cars than escaping from handcuffs.

A Lot not Alot
This one's easy. Alot isn't even a word. You wouldn't write abunch or ateensyweensybit or awombat, so never, ever, EVER write alot as one word because it's two words.

Effect vs Affect
I've stumbled over this grammarly log a time or two. Effect is most often a noun (we won't go into technicalities--an editor's got to earn his keep somehow) and affect is a verb. That means if you can substitute another verb where you've stuck this word, then you ought to be using affect.
Example: As an awkward adolescent, bullies affected me in junior high.
                As an awkward adolescent, bullies affected kissed me in junior high.
Kissed can work in the second sentence, albeit not logically, but even so, you'd use the word AFFECTED not effected.
Example: What effect did bullies have on you as an awkward adolescent?
                 What effect kisses did bullies have on you as an awkward adolescent?
See? That made no sense whatsoever, so the word remains EFFECT.

It's vs Its
If you have trouble with this one, I don't blame you. How many times did a grammar teacher rap your knuckles for forgetting an apostrophe to show possession? Yeah. This one flips that around. You DON'T choose the apostrophe to show possession in this case. You only use it to make a contraction for it is or it has, so if you can add in those words and it makes sense, then the apostrophe word is the one for you.
Example: It's always a good day to ride a unicorn.
                It's It is always a good day to ride a unicorn.
Makes sense, so the apostrophe choice is the winner.
Example: The unicorn is fun to ride because its mane is silky smooth.
                 The unicorn is fun to ride because its it is mane is silky smooth.
That does NOT make sense, so the non-apostrophe usage is the right choice.

There you have it. Go forth into the wide, wide world of writerly sports and kick some grammarly butt!