Writers are psychotic little mammals. All wired up and worried about contracts and sales numbers and does-this-book-make-my-butt-look-big? I've dealt with rejection, doubt, and fear here at Writer Off the Leash, but there's one issue I haven't yet scraped onto a petri dish and viewed under a writerly microscope. . . until now, that is.

Guilt.

We've all been there. Don't tell me you haven't got an internal mother inside your head pointing her finger at you. There's a plethora of things an author feels guilty about, everything from all the money you wasted getting a doctorate in osteopathic medicine and here you are writing Amish Zombie Romances, or that your family is destined to eat frozen pizza for dinner yet again. Okay, so maybe you don't feel guilty about those things, but there are common anxiety causing situations that most writers face.

Top 5 Guilt Inducing Scenarios

An overwhelming amount of regret for a sub-par word count.
Sometimes when you sit down to write, words clog into tangly globs, kind of like my stupid garbage disposal that keeps backing up. You feel bad because you know you're capable of more, but for whatever cosmic reason, the ol' creative juices just aren't flowing.

Shame weighs heavy on your shoulders when you think of the poor slobs out there in Nine-to-Five land.
Others eek out a living by the sweat of their brow, clocking 8-10 hours of back-breaking labor while you park your royal heinie on a cushioned office chair whenever you dang well feel like it.

Lack of a regular paycheck makes you feel a metric ton load of disgrace.
If you got paid by the word, this wouldn't be a problem. But it is. This kind of work doesn't bring immediate financial benefits, so there's not a whole lot to show for it up front . . . which creates tension.

You landed a contract and your critique partner didn't.
I hate it when this happens. There are so many fantastic writers out there who deserve to be published, so why did an editor scoop up my story and not theirs?

You should hate what you're doing like every self-respecting employee on the face of the earth.
But you don't. You love creating worlds and characters and super cool car chases that end in fiery explosions. But everyone else complains 24/7 about their drudgery at work, and though you try, you can't quite work up a single "drudgery" emotion to relate to them.

And that, my friends, is only the tip of the guilt iceberg. So, what's a writer to do with all this angst?

GUILT SOLUTIONS:

• Ignore all the naysayers and joy-crushers who heap coals of you're-having-way-too-much-fun on your head.
• Look at your writing as a  long-term investment, not a get-rich-quick money making scheme.
• Incorporate a paradigm shift: writing involves a LOT of thinking, so just because your fingers aren't flying over the keyboard, that doesn't mean you're not working.
• Keep in mind that creativity takes time. Michelangelo didn't paint the Sistine Chapel in a weekend.
• Make a to-do list and cross items off as you finish them so that you can see what you're accomplishing.