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Writers are insecure little mammals, all spastic and twitchy. No, really. Poke one with a harsh review and watch them curl up into a ball.

As a result, writers flock to conferences and seminars, forking out cash they don't have for all kinds of crazy workshops...

- How write a kick-butt Amish cozy romance space opera

- Creating characters that rip out a reader's heart, juggle it around for a hundred pages or so, then replace it with a kiss

- Rules to make the publishing gods bless you with a contract

I know. Those sound like stupid, made-up classes, and you're right, but the thing is that if these topics were offered as workshops, writers would attend. Why? Because they're looking for answers. Writers want to find the golden ticket to publication, but here's the deal...


Stephen King doesn't have them. Charles Dickens didn't. Not even J.K. Rowling can spout off the magical answer for how to hit the big time in the book biz. They can give you ideas, suggestions, and possibilities, but there's nothing carved in stone (hieroglyphics aside) that's an instruction manual for landing a contract. It's all advice.

You are the ultimate master of your writing success namely by writing. That's it. That simple. Anyone saying anything else is a snake oil salesman.